Solution: ignore

All signs point to this being a problem with Google Play’s Pre-launch Reports and not our code.

Edit: Google’s product and engineering teams are now aware of the issue. But it seems they might need a few more people to give them a sense of the scale of the issue. Perhaps consider posting on the bug report.

Update: Google have fixed it now by adding a filter for the process. See comment 256 on the bug report.

I have uploaded a few versions of my app and the problem is now gone.